Have you ever stared down the demonic depths of a dingy abyss?

Or

Have you ever felt that sudden urge to resign…when those dark eyes of lucid heights call you?

If not… then allow my words,
To take you,
Through the tranquilizing horror,
And the anxiety-ridden silence,
Of that moment.

That moment when life knocks you down,
You hit your head on the cold and rough floor;
The world goes dead;
Your feet go numb;
Your eyes meet the dark;
And your ears…
Your ears embody those maniacs,
Who talk to the hushed nights
And claim to have learnt the secrets of life.
Those maniacs might be poets!!

Anyhow…

That moment, my friend…
Can be the death of your soul.
That moment, my friend…
Can bequeath you with scars…so deep;

So deep…
That an artist won’t shy away before carving them onto a stone and shouting out loud,

“Has the world ever seen a carve so abstract?”

You… my friend,
Will be standing in that crowd of mute spectators,
About to raise your hand to claim that,

“This is the relic to my crippling agony!”

But…
Those words will never leave your lips;
Your teeth will bite your tongue before it sins to let them out!

Why?

Because…
When you take your pain and pour it onto those words;
When those words escape your mouth and reach some ears;
Then… your pain comes to life;

It becomes your “Forever”!

6 months ago, I remember writing this post for the milestone of 500 followers. Trust me, I was definitely at cloud nine and that’s where my obsession with the follower count subsided.

I had no idea, that I’d be reaching the next milestone so early.

For me, it’s not just a follower count, but this blog and the blogging community means much more than just numbers. This blog is the best thing that has happened to me in life so far.

I am so grateful for all of you and for the amazing support. It is such a pleasure to have you here on this journey and it’d be my honour to have you along even in the future.

Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to read, comment and follow.

I hope that I have been providing you with some quality content.

With lots of love,

Gauri Walecha.

Click here to read chapter-1.

Stella stood in front of the door; her hand was resting on the door knob and her eyes were closed…not to hide the gloom that ruled her heart for the past seven years…but to feel the warmth of the sun that had just dawned on the sky of her life.

“Are you sure?” asked Alex as Stella signed the cheque.

“I don’t think that I have any reason to not be sure!”

“But, didn’t you save this money to start your own company?”

“I did! But, when I was saving this money, I was wasting my life like a wreck, ignoring my happiness, my family’s happiness. In the last seven years of my life, I have tried to live a fool’s dream! I was trying to barter smiles for applause; I was trying to give away the beautiful life that I already had to buy a much cheaper and a fabricated world, a world of mirages, it does not even lets you see its voids before you become as hollow as this world! If giving away this money brings back those smiles on my parents’ face, then I don’t think that anything or any reason is valid enough to stop me from repaying this debt!”

A wide smile graced Stella’s lips as she relived that moment! She was proud…proud of her decision…she was proud of the fact that now, she knew what she really wants from her life.

That moment, that serene moment…as she stood in front of the door of her room, was the happiest moment of her life.  Nothing beats the beauty that lies in the strength needed to rebuild the fortress of your life.

She took a deep breath to feel the happiness that surrounded her and pushed the door open. She, then, slowly opened her eyes as she stepped inside her room. She witnessed every memory coming back to life, greeting her on her arrival. The woody scent that filled the air soothed Stella’s senses. She wanted to freeze that moment, then and there.

She felt like a traveler, who just returned from a long journey; she just came back to a home that she left behind in her endeavors; a home, that she once despised for its comfort and beauty, for the fact that it lacked adventure! That adventure, which was offered by the rugged roads that waited for her, outside the four walls! She left this home for them…but today, she could fight the world to call this home her own!

“Help me!”

Stella turned around to find John struggling with the luggage.

“Oh! I am sorry! I forgot that you were getting the luggage out of the car!”

Stella helped John and kept the bags on the table beside the bed. Tired from carrying the suitcases all by him, john threw himself onto the sofa. Meanwhile Stella got busy in unpacking her suitcase. To make some place for the clothes, Stella decided to examine the closet. A huge blow of dust came on her face as she opened the closet door. She started coughing.

“Oh God! This place has to be cleaned!” she managed to utter those words while she still coughed badly.

“No need! The lawyer has completed all the paperwork. Just sign on the dotted and we will be free!” John played with his fingers as he said that, trying to avoid making an eye contact with Stella. He suspected that after meeting her parents, meeting Alex and listening to their story, she might have changed her mind. His fear found a very firm ground in his head when he got to know about her decision to repay the debt using her life savings.

Stella gave out a deep sigh. “I am not selling the house!”

From her tone, she sounded uninterested to voice any further arguments in this regard. She expected her boyfriend of five years, and now his fiancé, to take that affirmation as obvious. She wanted his heart to answer that question before his mind would have even decided to give birth to it!

The fact that it was still unanswered, felt like a sword through Stella’s soul. The fact that john still expected her to sell the house was a red-flag for her, and definitely not the first one! She came across a similar red-flag when she saw a change in John’s expressions on hearing her decision to pay back the debt!

She knew that John was not on the same page as her…but this time, she was determined to not move even a single page to please him!

“I knew it!” John’s lips twisted in anger, his brow frowned in frustration. “I knew that you were an emotional fool! Oh God! How stupid am I? How did I even expect practicality from a person like you?” John was blazing with anger. He jumped up from the couch and started pacing back and forth as he attacked Stella with those words.

But Stella…her armor was strong; it was made with her deep emotions. An armor made of reasoning can be broken with an arrow of a strong argument, but an armor made of emotions is unparalleled!

“You can call me whatever you wish to! I am not selling this house!” Stella’ eyes oozed out the firmness of her decision.

John felt helpless! He kicked the side-table as he exited the room. The vase on the top of it fell down and broke into a thousand pieces. This time, those pieces were not a metaphor of her broken heart… but they represented the fall of that hollow and vulnerable Stella, whose part she played for the last seven years.

A tear left her eye to pay the due condolences to that Stella, and then she resumed her work as she gulped the rest of her feelings!

“Pass me that blue color!”

”Yes Sir!” Stella exclaimed as she passed the tube of color to her dad; she went, stood beside his canvas and started looking at his face!

“What are you looking at?”

“The face that I yearned to see for so many years!”

“Well! My face has wrinkled a lot since then!’

“Makes you look cuter!” Stella pulled her father’s cheek as she said that.

David took some blue paint and stroked it on Stella’s nose.

“Dad!’ He smiled and giggled.

“Don’t you trouble my daughter!” Emma entered the room with four glasses of juice. She kept them on the table and handed over a glass to Alex.

Stella noticed his plaster, “Hey! How is that so white? Why haven’t I drawn on it already?”

Stella picked up a marker and started drawing on the plaster in his hand. Emma took Stella’s place and started watching David paint with keen interest, her hand resting on his shoulder. They both looked at each other and smiled every now and then.

Looking at these smiles filled Stella’s heart with joy!
“They look so happy!”

“Yes! I can die for those smiles!”

“What about you? Are you happy Stella?”

“Yeah! Of-course! I am very happy! I am still pursuing my dream job and helping my father with his art gallery at the same time! I can’t even explain how much joy that brings to my heart! I won’t lie! Travelling every weekend is a little exhausting, but it is totally worth it!” Stella said that with the widest smile on her face!

“Do you have any idea about how beautiful you look when you smile? Start smiling more often, Stupid!” Alex said that as he pinched her nose.

Stella giggled and continued her drawing.

The wounds of her past were still red. She was still not over John…but her heart was not dead and barren now . Her heart was waiting for love to blossom!

She knew that Alex liked her…she liked him too!

But…she was not ready, her heart was not ready to risk a beautiful relationship, to exhaust its purity, force it to fill the wounds of her heart. She knew that she had to heal herself first, fall in love with herself again…and then allow love to cover her scars!

She smiled as she told that to herself!

THE END!

Click here to read chapter-9.

Stella gasped! She was terrified!

Standing in front of the window, pressing her hands against it, she could not believe that she was about to meet her parents. She could not believe that after whatever she did, her parents would still want to meet her!

It felt as if, in that moment Stella lost all her ability to think and act! She stood there like a statue-still, silent and almost lifeless!

Her parents rang the doorbell once again, Stella came back to her conscious with a sharp jolt! The window in front of her was now all fogged up because of the warmth of her breath, she wiped off the fog using one of her hands, revealing the shiny glass from behind, fairly reflecting back the image of her face! Stella could read the fear and remorse in her eyes, she could see that little girl screaming and wailing inside her…asking for help!

The suffocation in that prison of guilt was much more torturous than the suffocation of not being able to follow her dreams!

Her parents rang the bell two more times. It prompted her to shout back,“Coming!”Those words left her mouth, leaving behind tremors of fear.

NO….NO! Stella was not ready! She was not ready to face her parents. She clutched her hair above her head, her heartbeat peaked, and her face was flushed with pink!

She was still standing in front of the window, allowing panic to engulf her existence when she suddenly saw her mom. Her face had a faint smile with a wet trail starting from the corner of her eye honoring the tear that was just let out from her heart. Stella could sense an excitement on her face. She was holding David’s arm like Stella used to hold hers. David, her father was standing meekly at her mother’s side, his hand resting against the door, trying his best to not spill out his emotions.

“Stella!” he called out, his voice choking on tears. Stella quickly ran to the door and opened it. Seeing her parents, she froze.

“Stella!” her mom whispered to herself as she let out her treasured tears. She weakly walked towards Stella and hugged her.

The warmth and comfort in that hug changed something inside Stella’s heart. The glacier that was building up since the last seven years suddenly melted down. She burst into tears, wrapping her arms around her mom.

Her dad was standing there, being a silent spectator, admiring the beauty of the moment, holding back his own tears.

Stella looked at him, her face lightened up with a faint smile. The wounds of the past stood like a wall between them. For a moment, there was just silence. Her father smiled back at her but then left the doorway to go sit on the bench in the front yard.

Her mom turned around, just in the moment to see him walk out. She looked back at Stella, gave her a reassuring nod and then followed David into the yard.

He was sitting on the bench, cupping his face in his hands, his tears held hostage in his eyes. Stella’s mother went and sat on the bench near him, resting an arm on his shoulder.

“We talked about this, right?”

“I know! We did! But I don’t know what to say, what to do?” David replied as he rubbed his eyes to wipe any tears that might have escaped.

Meanwhile, Stella was standing in the doorway, holding the edge of the door, looking towards them. Stella’s mom motioned her to join them. She silently walked towards them, her hands clutched tight in a fist. She went to her dad and sat on the ground on her knees in front of him, with her hands gently resting on his knees.

Her dad seized to rub his face and looked towards her. The overwhelming emotions that he got to see in her eyes pinched his soul, they haunted him! He quickly turned his face away!

“I am sorry dad!” Stella tried to break the ice, her voice quivering with tears.

Her dad looked at her, his eyes all teared up.

“You read the letter?”

“Hmmm…!” Stella nodded and then added, “I could read only half of the letter. The other half was torn away in a brawl that Alex had with someone…”

“I know! I met Alex at the hospital!”

“How did you know that he will be at the hospital?”

David stared blankly at Stella. Emma, her mom, pressed his hand. He looked at her, unsure what to say next. She blinked her eyes in approval.

“Stella, I am sorry! I…I know that I was wrong seven years ago. I know that I have hurt you a lot….but trust me…I had no intentions of forcing anything upon you…” David pressed his lips and gave out a sigh.

“Ummm…when you left us, I was broken and a little mad too…not because you ran away… but …because no matter how much I tried, I could not fathom the fact that it was me telling you to give up on your dreams. I could not fathom my behavior. I lived an entire life feeling unsatisfied and empty just because I could not get the opportunity to follow the dreams that I had… How could I have possibly been an obstacle in someone else’s path?” David paused for a moment, trying to read through Stella’s eyes. His heart yearned for the pain that he saw in them. With a heavy heart, he continued, “….So, after you went away, I started an art gallery. Every single day that I spent working on my paintings, I felt proud of you…I felt proud of the fact that my daughter has a heart brave enough to go against every force in the world to follow her dreams but…. I am guilty of still not being able to overcome my fear of losing you forever.

I am guilty that I still have not been able to come in terms with my insecurities. I am guilty that I still hope for you to come back home!

I hate myself for never being able to grow out of the eerie feeling that I felt when you told me that you want to leave the city to chase your dreams!

I hate myself for saying ‘No’ then and I hate myself even more for not being able to change my answer in all these years!”

Stella pulled David in a hug as they both cried their heart out. Emma rubbed Stella’s back as she cried.

“Dad, it wasn’t just your fault! I am as guilty as you are! I should have tried to understand your point of view, may be waited a little longer before taking such a drastic step! Please don’t blame yourself!”

David broke out of the hug and kissed Stella on the forehead. She giggled like a little girl. There was a big smile on everybody’s face. “I love you Dad! I love you Mom!” she pulled both of them in a hug.

“I don’t have the ability to reverse all the damage that has already been done. I just hope we can be a loving family once again!”

Stella smiled as she said that…then curiosity took the hold of her…

“Dad, do you know anything about….”

David read her mind, “Yes! All that you experienced in the house, the fight that Alex got into…I knew everything….in fact…”

“Is that all related to the….”

“Art Gallery!” her mom intervened!

How is the art gallery related to the strange events that took place? What turn is Stella’s life going to take now?Find out in the upcoming chapters of “When I walked through”. Follow the blog to receive an e-mail every time we release a new chapter.

Click here to read chapter-8

Stella was standing in front of the door of her house. She clutched her bag in her arms. Her heart was scared, scared of the storm ahead! She looked at the door knob, the sole hindrance between her and her parents, the last wall between her and her dreams; or the last thread holding her family together.

She took a deep breath and twisted the knob. The door opened into the living room. Its decor inspired by the early nineties. The brown color of the walls pushed the room even farther away in time. Her father was sitting in the armchair, reading newspaper and holding his coffee in his left hand. While her Mom, she was in the kitchen. There was a faint aroma of freshly baked bread in the house.

The commotion in the doorway attracted her father’s attention. He was now looking towards her from behind his newspaper, his lips graced with a wide and sunny smile. The smile dawned over his wrinkles, making them look like the engravings of some old and celebrated monument.

That precious smile made Stella feel weak in the knees. Somewhere deep in her heart she knew that today was the farewell of the serenity in this paradise.

The conquest of chasing dreams was despised in her family since the day Stella lost her elder brother to his blazing ambitions.

She knew that her parents would never be convinced on letting her travel the same path.

Her father gave her a welcoming smile.

“Hi dear! How was your day?”

“My day was great dad! What about yours?”

“Well, my day was nothing less than exhausting!” he giggled and motioned her to sit on the near-by sofa.

She forced a smile on her face and sat there.

“So are you planning any trip after your graduation? Come on! You have hardly ever gone on a trip with your friends. Learn to have some fun Stella!”

“Actually, that is a great idea!”, exclaimed her mom as she entered the living room with some freshly baked loaves of bread. She placed the bread on the table and continued, “You should plan a nice relaxing trip with your friends. You have been studying the whole year, you need a vacation! Just look at you, you look exhausted!”

She hugged Stella from behind as she said this. Stella placed her hand gently on her mom’s arm and pressed it in reassurance with a plastered smile on her face.

She wanted to smile genuinely, but a fog of doubt and fear surrounded her happiness. It had been an entire week since she received her call letter from New York. Her application was accepted in an elite course in journalism.

She coiled back her fingers giving in to the questions in her brain, closed her eyes and then loudly announced in a single breath.

“I want to go to New York to pursue journalism! I know that you might not welcome my choice…but….I truly want to chase my dreams and ambitions! I know, whatever my brother had to go through was very unfortunate. It was unfortunate that he decided to end his life because he could not be successful in his endeavors…but …all that does not mean that even I will meet the same fate! Please, just give me one chance!”

For a moment, there was complete silence. No one spoke further. Stella mustered up her courage and opened her eyes in hopes of witnessing the light of agreement in her parents’ eyes, but rather she saw sternness.

Her parents looked at each other and then looked back at her. In a monotonous tone, her father said, “NO!” Then he got up from his chair and gave Stella a final look of disapproval before he exited the room!

Stella turned to face her mother. “Mom?” She gave her a sad nod and went back to the kitchen.

Stella saw her worst fears see the light of the day in that moment. She clutched her bag even tighter, rushed to her room and closed the door. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she leaned her forehead against the door and cried for the rest of the night.

“Stella!”John gently stroked her hair, abruptly pulling her out of her thoughts.

Stella was still hugging John. That hug reminded her of the first day, when they met. The wounds of her heart were still red then; she was broken, lonely, distressed; she dreaded her fate. The fort of her life was standing on a single fragile and decaying pillar, and just when the onlookers predicted its demise, John came there like a savior! Not only did he hold the roof when it was about to fall, but he also mended the cracks that time left on the withering pillar.

Reminiscence of the memories of their togetherness lit up Stella’s face. She lifted up her head from his shoulder and looked into his eyes, smiling from behind her tears. John smiled back.

“Excuse me, Sir!”

John and Stella looked towards the door to find their lawyer standing there. They immediately broke apart from the hug, their faces still flushed with pink.

Their lawyer, a man in his late forties, gave away a mocking grin to applaud the scene. He coughed and regained his composure.

“Hello, Ms. Stella! How are you?”

“I am fine…How are you?”

“I am fine too…. and I promise that you are going to feel even better when I break the good news to you!”

He said as he beamed with pride!

“What good news?”

“I have completed all the paperwork required for the deal. You just have to sign on the dotted line and you will be done with that property!”

Those words stung Stella in her heart like a thousand needles.

“So soon….You said that you needed more time! John?”

“It has been three days Stella!”

Because of all the events that took place in the last three days, Stella completed lost the track of time.

“Three days?” she looked at her phone. It had indeed been three days.

“Stella, I think you should go back, freshen up and relax a bit. I am here, I will take care of Alex and all the paperwork! You can come back later to complete rest of the formalities!”

“Yeah! I think you are right!”

She excused herself out of the room. The way back home was crowded with thoughts. It was Stella, who wished to sell the house, she wanted to move on in life, wanted to leave all the agony behind…. but her stay in the town, her father’s letter, meeting Alex…all of that changed her…. now she wanted her family back!

She reached home and stood in front of the door for a while. It was the last time that she would be entering her house. This thought shook her soul.

After a while, she pushed the door open and entered the living room. It felt like her childhood was coming back to life once again. A bittersweet smile dawned on her face.

She went around the room, picking up every single article, trying to relive every single memory….just then….the door bell rang!

It confused her. No one was expected to visit her. She rushed to the window to identify the visitor.

“Mom! Dad!”

Will Stella be able to face her parents? Which way will her story turn now?Find out in the upcoming chapters of “When I walked through”. Follow the blog to receive an e-mail every time we release a new chapter.

 

 

 

When I walked through….

I stood there…in the middle of a ring…the ring of fire! Which fire? The fire of my Ego!

It was encircling me, dancing with utmost elegance, celebrating my loneliness. Its flames were the bars of this prison, blinding me to the beauty of the world around, but ….teasing me with a glimpse every now and then.

In this cage, I was not alone…with me, was the beast….the huntress, the royal predator, the most skillful of its kind. Its moves were brisk yet silent, its stature was of the  undefeatable mountain and its eyes…..its eyes were cold, a door which opened into a freezing and cruel realm, just a look sent jitters down my spine. I was there with the despised beast, the beast of my pride!

I lived there for ages, but that day was different. That day, I saw the beast moving, walking towards me with an ambition to hunt me down, to kill me!

I was terrified, it was suffocating…I….I wanted to run away…I screamed for help.

And then…Someone called out my name…I looked around…It was a friend from the world outside. She was asking me to join her there, experience the bliss of freedom.

I stepped out…Yes… I did….only to find out that…  The world in the eyes of the beast was just a reflection of the world across the wall of fire.

I still wonder…what is more frightening; the beast within, or the cold and cruel world around?

Click here to read chapter-7

Stella stood there, in the middle of her room, holding a picture, a pleasant picture of her parents and her…….picture of a time when there was peace , no fight over dreams, no fight over rights, no tears, no sorrow!

There were too many noises in her brain, too much to be able to listen to any one of them. It seemed as though she was standing in the middle of a desert……her mouth was dry; her brow was frowned, sweat trickled down her neck. She felt as if all the blood in her body has rushed to her brain, it seemed as though her body foresaw the war and its qualms before Stella could have even thought about it!

There was a tension in the air, taut enough to be able to break every axe that came to cut it! For the first time in her life, Stella heard silence cry and wail…..it pierced through her ears. She tried to swallow the saliva in her mouth, it was thick, very thick…. she almost choked on it.

The picture that she held in her hands was the first attack of the war, straight on her heart, salt for her wounds! Her heart beat went very high; she was scared for her life. Her pulse was rising, higher….and higher…..higher enough for her to hear it, it ringed in her ears. Her heart was begging for help, warning her for the storm, telling her not to step outside!

She was boiling, as though she had the worst fever ever known and then…..she felt cold, as cold as ice, frighteningly cold. For a second she wondered if she was still alive. Scared, she immediately kept the picture back.

It was hard for her to face her parents, even in a picture! Those smiles added fuel to the fire of her guilt!

She shook her hands, rubbed them against each other and then rubbed them on her face and her eyes. Closing eyes was not scary for her now, the world outside was as dark as the world within!

She picked up the picture for the last time, hugged it and then kept it back without looking at it. Those smiles could have tied her down but she strived to be free! She picked her bag and started towards the window but stopped dead at her spot….turned back and then looked at every single thing in her room. It was not just a glance, she wanted to record every single detail, capture it with her eyes. Her room was special, it had seen a lot…..it had seen her cry, laugh, break down, then pick up her own pieces to fix herself and then move forward. Here, she was looking at it for the last time; she knew that she will never be back! She looked at everything, closed her eyes to picture it in her mind, gave a deep sigh, and then opened her eyes again to bid it a smiley goodbye. Her eyes were already teary; the smile appeared like a rainbow formed on a very gloomy sky!

She then rushed back to her window and escaped, without ever looking back!

“Emergency! Emergency!”

The noise immediately caught Stella’s attention. She was lost so deep in her memories that it took her a few minutes to realize that she was in a hospital for the treatment of her friend and that seven years have already passed since the night she eloped! Her eyes fell upon the letter in her hands….just a piece of paper but felt as heavy as a huge metal boulder. She swallowed her saliva; it was just as thick as that night, tainted with her guilt, enough to choke her!

With a very scared heart, she started to read,

“Dear Stella,

It has been a while, I know! I know that I should have tried to reach you sooner! I know that I should have never allowed our relationship to stoop to this level in the first place! I know that you deserved the right to explore the world with your own perspective …. but …..alas! I don’t know why I tried to stop you then!

When I was young, my mom always used to teach me about the importance of nurturing relationships with love.  She used to tell me that a relationship is like a piece of glass, you heat it with the warmth of your love, give it some time and then mould it into a vial. This vial contains your guilt, sorrow, happiness, failures, achievements, flaws and beauty. The more love that you provide it; the larger it grows, holding more and more parts of your life. But, if you lose your patience, become greedy and try to stretch it forcefully without giving it the love and time that it deserves, it breaks, spilling all that it once held, and you….you end up losing a huge part of yourself. Since the night you left, her words have been a hymn for me!

But, I am not writing this letter to dwell on the past, I am writing it to inform you about something very important, something that I am guilty of…..”

The paper was torn after that. She was trying very hard to hold back her tears, her lips were twitching. She felt helpless, ran her fingers against the torn end of the paper, hoping to read whatever was left unsaid, turned the paper and found something more….

“I am sorry, Stella! I know that I should have told this to you earlier, but…I just could not find the courage in myself!

I know that I have disappointed you, sorry again. Maybe I do not deserve an apology but please try to grant me one if you can.

Miss you!

Your loving father,

David.”

Stella could not hold her tears back! A stream trickled down her cheeks. She missed her father too! She wanted to meet him, hug him, tell him that she has already forgiven him and say sorry for giving him so much pain. She wanted to say so much, hear even more, wanted to be that loving daughter again. I wish she knew where he was!

A hand came on Stella’s shoulder. She turned back to find John. He felt like an oasis in the middle of a desert, like a drop of water on barren land. She immediately hugged him and cried…..cried…and cried on, like a baby!

What was Stella’s father trying to tell her? How are the events going on in the house related to him?Find out in the upcoming chapters of “When I walked through”. Follow the blog to receive an e-mail every time we release a new chapter.

 

 

Click here to read chapter-1

I was sitting in a rocking chair with a pen and diary in my hand. It creaked as I rocked it back and forth. The room was silent and had a dim oil lamp which accented its decor with a beautiful yellow.  The room was silent, but my mind was not! In my mind, there was nothing but chaos, uninvited noises and fear. Chaos because of all the time that I had wasted, noises of taunts that came from unmotivated mouths and fear of failure. I sat there silent and allowed my pen to run on the paper, to run far away from whatever I was experiencing.

The last drop of the oil in the lamp crackled as its soul rose up, burning with a bright yellow flame. The insects stayed there, being silent spectators to the departure of their love. The room started loosing its yellow accent as the fire blew out, handing over the throne to the moonlight.

I frowned. I was disappointed. It seemed as though the lamp was mocking my situation and the chore of reigniting the fire was a token of this mockery! I kept my pen and diary on the table, folded my arms and sat there for a while, staring into nothingness.

Drops of water trickled down the faucet. The last flock of birds flew back to their homes. The clock struck ten. The night had just begun its journey to rest in the dawn. I had just begun my journey to thrive in the burning fire of my ambitions. This thought prompted me to jump out of my brief meditation and surrender to the demands of the lamp.

I picked up a match box, some oil and started the fire. At first, it hesitated, as though it feared that it would not be able to fill in the shoes of its predecessor, but then, it chose to embrace its fear rather than fighting back. The fire allowed the fear to fuel its will and burnt even brighter than the one before it. I stood there for a while, with a smile on my face and a hope in my heart. A hope to embrace my fears just like the fire did!